Sunday, February 5, 2012

10 I'm just sayin's

1.  It really is okay to say no.
2.  Delaying gratification really does have it's benefits....it's much sweeter.
3.  Say "no" to spray tanning... orange is not a natural skin color, nor a flattering one!  And especially kids....their skin is radiant at this age all by itself -  no lines, wrinkles....teach them to embrace it!!
2.  Don't talk on your cell when you drive them in the car.  Practice what you preach. They are watching.
3.  When you are strollling with your baby in the carriage, put the cell phone down. Do you really want your baby to hear that babble instead of  the beautiful sounds of nature?
4.  Read... Sing.... Play board games..... Create art. Enough said.
5.  Go outside!!!
6.  Expose them to the arts in all forms! They are like sponges. Take them to plays, concerts, exhibits...the discussions after are priceless!
7.  Hug and tell them you love them every single day as much as you can!! (yes, even when they push you away, do it anyway!)
8. Take them to restaurants - let them learn  how to behave in public.  No cellphones or gameboys at the table either.
9.  Let them learn to enjoy their own company and solitude. Learning to treasure the stillness is a true gift.
10. Let them fall! They WILL pick themselves back up!

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Listen

“Mommy i need to tell you something!”
just a second honey. let me just finish this one last e-mail (phone call, facebook, text --you fill in the blank)
Put down your phone, your Ipad, your blackberry....whatever device is occupying you at the moment.
Look your precious child in the eye and really listen when they talk. 
Hear what they say........ give them your undivided attention......be present......
Because someday they may just stop talking ....

Monday, June 6, 2011

A New World

Loader...... Backhoe...... Dump Truck....... Bobcat........Digger........
Before my precious son came into my world, i had no idea that there were SO many names of construction trucks. To say that he was obsessed with them is an understatement. Driving was an adventure, the fun we had identifying them. He knew the names of each one, and could spot them from far away. And seeing a double trailer was a fabulous bonus.
A simple walk around the block could turn into an activity whenever there was construction in our neighborhood. My son never tired of watching these trucks, and the men in them , do their jobs. This led to books about trucks, songs about trucks, and toy trucks galore.....even a room decorated with trucks painted on the wall.
A whole new world that i never even knew existed.
And one i feel so blessed to now be privy to.

Monday, May 9, 2011

Time or Things

What do you think your children would rather have?? Time together........or things?
When they look back at their childhood, do you think they will cherish what you bought them or what you did with them?
If you were present at their sporting or arts events, or whether you brought them presents to make up for not being there?
Not much more to say on the subject......just a little food for thought.

Monday, May 2, 2011

Strict?

i ran into an old friend from high school. He told me that he had heard i was a strict parent.
When did not allowing underage drinking, nor condoning it become known as strict and not the norm?
Besides the fact that the teenage brain is still developing and not equipped to handle alcohol.
Or the fact that statistics show that those who drink at a young age are several times more likely to abuse alcohol.
Or even the recent study that shows that parents who “allow” underage drinking is backfiring on them in that these kids are at much higher risk of having alcohol issues later in life.
Not to mention the fact it IS illegal!
I see these parents who are more concerned with their kids being popular than instilling solid values. They provide the alcohol so the kids will congregate at their homes. They feel as long as they take the keys away from these underage drinkers and don’t allow them to drive, they are responsible parents.
Yes we seem to be the minority.
Yet to me, not supporting underage drinking doesn’t make me a strict parent, it makes me a smart, caring one.

Read....and never stop

Our nightly ritual. The books are chosen from our library of many, my lap occupied, the reading begins.
You hear it stated over and over again.....read to your kids from the time they are babies to instill that lifelong love of literature.
So simple and yet so true.
And no excuses. It doesn’t matter how tired you are or that you have unfinished work or a pile of waiting laundry.
Or that you have read the same book the last ten nights in a row because it is the current favorite.... take the time anyway.
When our children were babies, and too little to understand, the gentle cadence of the words was soothing and the bonding priceless. As they grew, the pictures captured their attention. The little hands pointing, touching.
And that moment they read on their own is one that no parent EVER forgets!
But don’t stop there. Keep reading to them. Or read together, one page by you and the next, your child.
We would often go to the bookstore or library and just browse around....time ceased to exist, there was so much to explore. Our house runneth over with books as a result.
My three children all have a love of reading.....my daughters AND my son. I believe this is not a fluke.
No material gift you can give your child can ever compare.

Monday, April 11, 2011

Excuses

“They don’t want to be with us, they would much rather be with their friends.”
How many times have we all heard this? Yes, sometimes of course it is true. And being with friends is important no doubt there.
But other times i believe it is an excuse.
This statement lets parents off the hook......allows them to be self indulgent without the guilt. A justification for their own pursuits.
Yes, it takes time and energy to be a good parent. To create a family with bonds. And it is often the much easier to make the above statement. and walk away.
A friend once told me how whenever they went out to dinner as a family, her daughter and son would bicker away, then her husband would get involved and how it just wasn’t worth it to continue to try. So they didn’t.
Another told me the story of her neighbors who have never taken their kids on one of their countless vacations. Much easier not to they tell her.
Many of these same people then try to compensate by buying their kids “things.” Do they really think that things make up for not being together?
It takes time to build a family.
The foundation takes love and care and sometimes tears yet yields so much joy.
And it grows from its foundation, until a special bond is forged - a safety net - made up of people who love you unconditionally and who have the same experiences as you. Experiences that only you uniquely have together. A special dynamic that is yours and carries you through when you have rough times. Take the “time.”
Take the time......
It is SO worth it!